Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize