Whod you bang
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize