Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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