it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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