it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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