She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
