I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize