My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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