how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
