your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
