there was a trapeze. enough said
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize