She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
