Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
he laminated a picture of his dick.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
