found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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