is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize