I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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