apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize