I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
