I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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