It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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