I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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