Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
