Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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