ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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