Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Randomize