We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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