Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
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