I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
