remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
