So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
