and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
