Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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