i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
