whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize