Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
