I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
