new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
