So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
