I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
