if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
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