dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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