I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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