Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
