Well douche your snatch and let's go!
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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