we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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