he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize