I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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