My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
