Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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