Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
