soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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