why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
